Wednesday, April 13, 2011

"Scream 4" World Premiere

We all scream.

Darlings, it was the "Scream 4" world premiere at Grauman's Chinese Theatre in Hollywood and the style directive was clear: everyone must wear shitty, boring dresses.


Aimee Teegarden in Emporio Armani

We've seen more exciting lamp shades in Target.


Alison Brie in Paule Ka

$29.99 at Chico's.


Anna Paquin in Cushnie et Ochs

Well, it's not boring, at least. Actually, scratch that; it IS boring. Just because there's a strip of skin showing doesn't make it interesting.


Arielle Kebbel in Gomez-Gracia

DOUBLE-U TEE EFF, what's with all the lack of color here?

Your shoes are too big, honey. It's the only interesting thing going on with your look.


Camille Winbush

Boring, although the neutral shade does look great on her, we have to say. The shoes look like tin foil, though.


Courteney Cox in The Row

Sure, it's another plain black dress, but look! LACE! How shockingly innovative!

Yes, we're cranky.


Elise Neal in Mandalay

It's white and silver, which are major points against it just because it's so boring, but at least the dress has some interest and looks good on her.

Look at this! We're complimenting this plane Jane dress like it's couture! That's how bad this RC is. We're desperate for something pretty and interesting.


Emma Roberts in Burberry Prorsum

HALLELOO!

Hate the shoes, but the dress is very cute. And honey, the Black Swan hair is doing you no favors. The Roberts family is known for their large features. Aunt Julia figured out a while ago that big hair was the way to go.



Hayden Panettiere in Zac Posen

It's a little "Alexis Carrington goes to the prom" but we'll take it. It's not boring and colorless, at least. Wouldn't have paired the Minnie Mouse pumps with it, though.


Kristen Bell in Vanessa Bruno

Blue! An exciting new trend in red carpet wear! Anything but black or white, please God! It's an okay dress. The shoes have some interest but it looks like she's got some shit hanging off them and we hate silly shit hanging off shoes.

Lucy Hale in Georges Hobeika

Well, it's black, but at least it's not totally dull. We'll give her some cred--JESUS, MARY, AND OPRAH, THOSE MAY BE THE UGLIEST SHOES WE'VE EVER SEEN. They look like they're made out of trash bags.

Hey, that's a little exciting, isn't it? Here, in the midst of all these boring-ass dresses, little Lucy Hale (who we've never heard of before now) managed to break out The Ugliest Shoes in History. Brava, dear.


Marielle Jaffe

On another night we might have considered this a bit ugly, but we'll take what we can get.


Marley Shelton in NIKOLAKI

Pretty, but a little prom-y.


Savannah Jayde

It's a cute look. A little boring and a little casual for a red carpet, but we'll give it to her because it's not another style-free cocktail dress.



Rosanna Arquette

It could have been styled a hell of a lot better, but we like this dress.



Neve Campbell in Vivienne Westwood Red Label

This looks like she rang up Marisa Tomei and asked to borrow one of her dresses. It's not a bad dress, but the tight hair doesn't help it.

Thankfully, this red carpet had a special "Crazy Section" in order to keep us entertained. Crazy ladies, let's see what you wore:


Nia Vardalos

She left the house like this knowing that her picture would be taken. Isn't that just amazing? Lace shorts, black tights, and blue suede shoes with a polka dot blouse. This is a prime example of why you should name out loud the pieces of your outfit before you leave the house. Mirrors lie, but anyone with an ounce of common sense would head back to the closet after hearing themselves utter that description.


Patricia Arquette

Honey, we applaud you for not being boring, but your outer space dress is unflattering and weird-looking.



[Photo Credit: getty, wireimage]


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